A Conflict Memory (Blog Prompt)

A Very Merry Christmas…

Sorta… Not Really… Yeah Pretty Terrible

I tend to not get into too many conflicts, but have been a witness to many. It can be fun to watch conflicts between people you don’t know. When the people in conflict are your friends or family it becomes a very serious issue that sometimes put you in the middle.

The most recent and  severe conflict occurred during this past December at a social gathering of friends (party). The party was great at first, it was just us close friends. We sat around and goofed off for hours;playing games and simply enjoying each others company. Then my best friend brought over her boy friend who is notorious for being off pudding (astonishingly annoying and weird) and he had brought over his pack of hoodlums. And so our fun began to crumble right before us. They brought the vibe of the party to an all time low and everyone wanted him gone. Personally I like the dude, he’s not too shabby and pretty humorous which is a great quality in people. He’s just a little thug-y which I don’t identify at all with. I don’t really remember anything after their arrival because I went to sleep, but this is how the story goes: so everyone says.

Things didn't escalate until he thought someone else was trying to snatch his girlfriend. He began threatening everyone at the party (to fight) and even laid hand on his girlfriend. Ummm I kinda don’t know in what sequence this all went down, it doesn't help being unconscious but I’ll try for everyone. So I think neighbors notified the police because of all the yelling. The off pudding guy had already left so the cops went out to search for him in case he tried to come back because he had left his backpack and girlfriend. Not much later the guy was back and banged on the door for a long time. He claimed he only wanted his things but everyone knew he would start conflict with his girlfriend. And so the cops came again in response to the banging only to find him gone… again. Maybe around 8am the guy came back and someone opened the door (idk who). He stowed away with his stuff on his back and the girl in his arms.

FIN

My initial response was astonishment, I had never thought of things escalating to that level. I never thought he could get like that, sometimes you just don’t know people as well as you had thought. I typically respond with impulsive actions or words, which isn't a good way of facing conflict. Since I was unconscious during the conflict I didn't have a chance to react in the moment. Later I was forced to throw everything in the open because the guy confided in me as his girlfriends best friend. I genuinely felt betrayed by him, I was on his side the entire time everyone else was hating on him. Through his actions he had given me a reason to join the crowd and hate him. It created tension initially from telling him about all the ways he messed up, but in the end we came to terms with it and began plotting a way to move forward. We have now reached a peace stage in which the guy is repenting for all the bad he has done. Hopefully there will be bliss in the near future between him and everyone else… as impossible as it sounds.